Here is what I want you to know:
7. Relationships with spouse/partner, family, and friends will be impacted by your loss. It is important to be aware of the tendency to isolate during this time. Receiving appropriate support will be imperative in your healing and there may be work to do in relearning your relationships given this new reality. If you are unable to get the support that you need from loved ones, reach out to a therapist who can help.
8. While you desperately want your spouse/partner to understand what you are going through, he/she may not. People grieve differently. Often, losing a baby is a very different experience for a mother than it is for her partner, as she was the one who felt the development of this baby and feels, still, the physical loss as her body adjusts to no longer being pregnant. Give space for your own process as well as your partner’s.
9. You are likely to learn who your truest friends are during this time. Some people’s insecurities and fears around loss and tragedy may interfere with their ability to be there for you. It is entirely appropriate for you to spend time with those who are able to give you what you need, and to take distance from those who do not.
10. It is normal to feel triggered into sadness and despair when you least expect it. You may find reminders in the places where you least intend them to be. Seeing other pregnant women, babies, holidays and anniversaries, playgrounds, doctor’s offices, advertisements for baby-related items all may bring you to tears even when you feel strong. This is normal.