So when a narcissist encounters the people pleaser, recognizing these tendencies, what might he/she be thinking? How about these possibilities:
- I just hit the jackpot!
- Let’s see how far I can push my agenda.
- I really like it when you are subordinate. What else will you do for me?
- You need a strong person to tell you what to do, and I’m just that person.
- Knowing that you like harmony, I can use my anger to make you conform.
- Your gregarious, pleasant nature indicates weakness, and I’m fine with that.
There are four “requirements” narcissists have that the people pleaser will need to shed in order to preserve personal stability. The shedding of these “requirements” will become the beginning of establishing the necessary boundaries with the would-be dominator:
to be continued. . . .