This goal is a game changer. In most cases, this means needing your husband to become 100% honest with you and everyone else. He needs to be accountable, stop his problematic behaviors completely, and make restitution to those he has harmed — beginning with you and your children.
Until your husband can make and maintain those changes without resentment toward you, hold boundaries to keep yourself safe. If he exhibits the following behaviors, it’s a sign he is capable of sharing your emotionally safe home.
- Honest and humble
- Willingness to meet your needs without anger, resentment, or retaliation
- Accountable for his lies, porn use, masturbation, and infidelity
- Accountable for his emotional abuse, deception, manipulation, and gaslighting
- Continually making restitution for his lies, infidelity, and abuse
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