If you are being smeared by the narcissist, what they do, and how you can help yourself.
The smear campaign is used, so the narcissist can keep their false self hidden, so you’re the crazy one, the trouble maker and you’re the abuser, everything they did to you, they’ll make out you did to them. So they can walk free, from any responsibility.
It’s a method they use so they can get their reality in first. They usually start this before the relationship is even over, and you will most likely have no idea it’s happening. You might find out from someone around you. The narcissist might have also told someone you know things that the narcissist knows will inform you. So they can watch you react. Possibly the first you’ll know about the smear campaign is if you decide to stand up for yourself and try to tell someone who they really are. Or when you have escaped.
You may get blank looks, or shaking heads of disbelief from others, and this is horrible when you really need someone’s help.
Some types of smears campaigns they use are.
1. You are the abuser, and they will tell people how cruel you are to them, either not letting them have their say, not letting them go out with friends, always stalking their phone, ( which you may have done if you suspected they were cheating.) not looking after the home or children correctly. ( which might have happened to some who end up with anxiety and depression due to the narcissists manipulation and gaslighting.) Not showing any affection to them. Locking them out of the house, ( which you may have done out of fear.) to pouring freezing cold water over them while in the bath, pretending it’s a joke. They will give a long list while making out how good they were putting up with you. They will either tell all the things that they did to you, yet twist the fact you did it to them, or they’ll tell how you reacted while missing out the part of what they did in the first place to cause your reactions.
2. Money, they will tell people they work hard every day to earn money, while you sit spending all their money. If you saved carefully for six months to buy yourself a new coat, they would tell people that you’ve blown their money again. Again if you’ve been with a narcissist you probably already know they try to bleed you dry. I shall add financial abuse at the end.
They will say your a leach and a freeloader.
TO BE CONTINUED. . . .