Being Discarded Like You Don’t Exist
This can be as painful as being replaced.
But, before I get into the details, I just want to make one thing VERY clear. If you have gone No Contact with a narcissist (discarded and turned your back on them) because of abuse, pathological lies, adultery (and the list goes on), you have NOTHING to feel guilty about.
You know how you tried to converse, reason and deal with this person to NO avail – and truly you were never going to be able to reclaim your soul and your life unless you made this move.
There is a huge difference between someone who goes No Contact for these reasons and how a narcissist does it. With a narcissist it is often a brutal act as a result of, for example, them being caught out doing something horrific or as a response to you trying to assert boundaries and rights.
What marks a narcissist’s behavior compared to yours is that there is no trying to reason, work with facts or be accountable for anything – it is just ‘switch and ditch’ – and of course it leaves you reeling.
How YOU Can Rise Like the Phoenix Out of the Ashes
Now let’s get very clear about something.
I’m passionate about YOU healing. And for that reason, I don’t want you to use this article as a ‘sharing of war stories’ about what happened at the end of your relationship. That is NOT my purpose.
This article, as all of mine are, is about healing towards true solutions rather than staying mired in the trauma. Moving forwards and away from narcissists can only happen by investigating and healing the screaming traumas that have been ignited within you.
This is the thing… All of us in narcissistic relationships were treading water. We were walking on broken glass, suffering resolvable issues that just would not stop. We were constantly trying to survive our life with another person, who simply did not have the resources to be a sane and healthy partner.
This is what I know about your soul’s mission to evolve – if you are living in a Life that does not represent your True Self and True Life, then the heat gets turned up until you get booted out of it. It is irrelevant whether you chose to leave or were left. You were NOT living life as Who You Really Are.
After the end of your relationship, the recovery work is about confronting the things within you that HURT that are triggered off in order to cross your threshold into your True Self and True Life.
When you start Thriver Healing and go inside and start releasing your traumas and False Beliefs, you will find all sorts of survival fears, such as abandonment terrors and false beliefs that were causing you to try to seek your wholeness, love, and approval from another source.
How you find these, is simply by going to ‘what hurts’ inside you when the relationship ends; all of the heartbreak, fear, panic and associated traumas that have been activated.
It truly is a complete illusion, that by focusing on the narcissist and what they are or aren’t doing, that your salvation comes. It doesn’t; it’s only created by going inside yourself and doing the work there.
I promise you, with all of my heart, that the end of your narcissistic relationship is where your True Self and Life can finally begin.